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Turning 29 years old , Learnings in last 12 months

Hey people

Hello from somebody who calls writing her hobby and inconsistently shows up on her blog once in 3 months to deliver a monologue.

I turned 29 years old couple of weeks back .I've chosen to measure my growth over a year rather than everyday to see how I'm growing as a person. The value system I'm building in.
So continuing my tradition of writing down my learning. Here are things I learnt in last 12 months .

1.Knowledge compounds faster than money
The number of experiences is proportional to number of goofups. Enjoy the process , carry the learning, especially your mistakes.I've always followed it , I did wander off my own policy but the head now is in right place.

2. Don't take opposition seriously
This comes from a funny experience. I'd adopted a pet cat. There was alot of resistance from my family. Overtime, the person my cat likes the least is me. My family is more emotionally inclined to my cat than I am. Give people time to absorb change like you give yourself. Kindness.Same works for workplace.

3.Conflict resolution
I heard this line in Shark Tank India, one of the judge asked the start up founder how they deal with conflict. The founder said they don't have any conflict of interest within their team. The judge put it very well and explained that Conflict is expected when cerebral people are in the room.That is how great ideas and solutions are generated. 
Attending feedback meetings in my own department and a couple of debates outside as an audience made me realise how people get defensive and spoil a chance of improving a possible opportunity to learn and solve the problem in hand. 

4 .Reaction and Response
One of the best things I've learnt this year is to name my feelings. So what I do is ,when there is an incident that bothers me. I take a mental walk through the incident, sit down with some food( hypoglycemia, of course) and think. Have I or the person there responded or reacted? Should I respond or react to this out of place thing? 
It helps me get a solution based approach to the situation. It also made me more empathetic giving the opposite party benefit of doubt.( I'd like to believe so.)
The validation of this method being effective came from the MRCEM OSCE mocks I'd attended , the feedback was decent.

5.Impulse management 
I'm a self confessed workaholic and I do take alot in my plate than I can digest. Some people would find it right, call it hustle and say thats how you grow in your life. I realised I developed this "camel hump syndrome" where you basically burden yourself with many tasks and end up completing nothing .
So, before signing up for a commitment, I sleep through the thought . Most of the impulsive thoughts are lost in first night, some take about a week. Its a great way to save money though. Also a great tool to avoid burnout.

6.Sequence of life priorities
Till the year 2020 , I thought it was work ethic before everything . 2021 I thought being healthy ( disease free, Indian understanding) was important, later the same year I realised money was more important. The idea changed over time and the sequence currently is
The sequence of Health, fitness , wealth ,social support. You definitely cant choose one. Everything is interlinked. I've secretly begun to judge people based on their fitness. ( Mean but true story) Probably because in my journey towards fitness I realised, my fitness level was not basic and you envy things you don't have. 

7. Polishing Hardwork perspective 

What you work on is more important than how hard you work.Well enough said.You canr work on every in one month. Prioritise.

8.YouTube one of the best free school
#Fact Yet cannot beat practice and experience.

9. Being Vulnerable

People who are ahead of you are not landmines , create a conversation and learn from them.There are 2 schools of thoughts on vulnerability. Some people say dont show your weakness. Some say put it out there , discuss and learn. I believe in the latter one.

10.Leadership
You dont just learn about leadership ( you see, observe , discuss , read and practise it). There is no perfect leader. You work with handful of them . Customise your working style.

11. Enjoying Singledom
I realised I have about a dozen girls in my immediate family who are younger to me . So by not getting about turning 30 , choosing to stay single or settle down comfortably after 30 I m influencing the choice of one whole generation of girls. My decision could be a blockbuster or a total disaster, but it would be mine. I would be an example good or bad time will decide. All I can do is work on myself year by year absorb and adsorb the change.

12. Adapting to change: Best 2 cents

The best learning of the decade came from a friend. I told him , "You know what my mind changes in a few months. I am not able to take a stand for an idea . I see myself contradicting myself over a period of time. I don't recognise with the person I was few months back( Thoughts and ideas ) . When I look at my 25 year old self , I think who was this girl what was she even thinking when she did this . The constant change is unnerving.I know the change is the only thing thats constant. Its been very dynamic for past 2-3 years. "
He gave me his 2 cents , I should tell you these were worth $100 of therapy. " Stop taking yourself so seriously. You are in process of becoming something.This 28 year old Wajeeha is not "The Wajeeha ."she is yet to evolve.Go with the flow. You're feeling the dynamic change because you're going out putting yourself out there at a new platform out of your comfort zone multiple times. The more you expose yourself, you get more experience, more learning. More learning is more application of learning. The more you apply the more you'll change." This really helped me get hold of myself and continue my journey with curiosity to learn new things.Thats too much of philosophy but you need to talk to people specially people you think will help you get a perspective. 
Acknowledge , absorb and adsorb selectively,move on.




So far so much


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